hmmm . . .

I had once resolved some point in the distant past never to start posts with non-sensical titles. like this one.
well, that resolution comes to an end.

It's been an interesting few days...

being zoinked from sleep deprivation for three days + no caffeine intake in the last week...
going bonkers with a digicam...
shopping with sumone else pushing the cart in a supermart (way 2 good man)...
living out the six year old in my head. his views, his actions, his choices...
seeking dumb lil pleasures in dumb lil tasks...
switching to fruits for a midnight snack
(in place of the regular peanut butter-jelly altercations)...
hearing my mom smile over the phone as i chat away with her at midnight...
remembering my favourite dish at home
(basmati rice+arhar dal+sliced onion salad)...
chatting for hours about nothing at all in general...
remembering what hedonism is all about n why i'm a proponent...
giving an acquaintance a nice few hours of hell
(by speculating over a few questionable pics) ...
wondering why (sh)it always happens around me...
taking long walks in the rain...
shooting mint adverts in moving vehicles using transmogrifiers...
reading a book under a streetlamp waiting for a bus...
juggling between three handsets, none of which work properly...
wondering aloud at 03:21 hours...

boy, i almost feel alive again...

hmmm . . .

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Now playing:
Tchaikovsky - 1812 Overture

Welcome to The Machine

the lyrics say it all:

Welcome my son, welcome to the machine.
Where have you been?
It's alright we know where you've been.
You've been in the pipeline, filling in time,
Provided with toys and 'Scouting for Boys'.
You brought a guitar to punish your ma,
And you didn't like school, and you
know you're nobody's fool,
So welcome to the machine.

Welcome my son, welcome to the machine.
What did you dream?
It's alright we told you what to dream.
You dreamed of a big star,
He played a mean gituar,
He always ate in the Steak Bar.
He loved to drive in his Jaguar.
So welcome to the Machine.

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Now playing:
Pink Floyd - Welcome To The Machine

Finally!!!

Finally got all my affairs in order....
back to blogging after a long time, or rather finally blogging on a regular basis, after many abortive attempts.
Got my schedules sorted out, my overdue sleep compensated, my semester's quota of sleeping and missing classes...
at long last, have my website up on the LAN...
and am finally reading all those mails in my inbox BEFORE archiving them away.
now all that remains is putting away all these books that make up most of my the landscaping in my room.
and of course, the inescapable fate of watching my brain mutate n shrivel n die regularly for infinite 50 minute intervals (my take on attending classes).
enough crapping. time to get back to counter strike. have'nt killed for a long long time :-)

wonder whether there's a smiley for an evil grin...

anyone?

If

If you can keep your head when all about you

Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;

If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,

But make allowance for their doubting too;

If you can wait, and not be tired by waiting,

Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,

Or, being hated, don't give way to hating,

And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;

If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;

If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster

And treat those two impostors just the same;

If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken

Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,

Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,

And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings

And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,

And lose, and start again at your beginnings

And never breathe a word about your loss;

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew

To serve your turn long after they are gone,

And so hold on when there is nothing in you

Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,

Or walk with Kings - not lose the common touch;

If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;

If all men count with you, but none too much;

If you can fill the unforgiving minute

With sixty seconds' worth of distance run -

Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,

And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!

Rudyard Kipling

The Road Not Taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that, the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Robert Frost

I Should Write This

Something tells me that I should not bother writing this.
Someone just told me otherwise.

Oh Well, What The Hell.

It's Been a Hard Day's Night alright.That much is for sure.
Woke up at 6 am, to see how The Sikander Ansari Episode develops.
Reached the passport office after half an hour of torturous waiting in the rain for the morning bus, and 6 (YES, SIX!) changes of transportation. only to wait there and find that I'm too early at 9:30 am. Got frustrated and started logging the entry times of the staff at the office.
(only staffers were allowed to enter)
<did i just call them staffers?>
It went something like this:

09:38 Two guys on a bike
09:48 The Passport Officer arrives in his Amby
09:52 Another Guy on a bike
09:54 A Ma'am walks in
09:58 Yet another guy on a bike
10:03 A Guy on a scooter
10:04 A Guy on an Atlas Bicycle
10:05 A Ma'am on a moped
10:07 Two Guys walk in
10:09 A guy walks in, walks out, then in again
10:15 The Doors open for us commoners

Note that the security guard was actually unchaining and chaining the gate every single time until now.

10:30 I am allowed into the Passport Officer's Office.

He takes one perfunctory look at my passport, another at me, then drones to the peon: mumble gumble jumble slurmble gagzooka bleargh. Next, he asks me to give an application as if it is just another compliant. I mean no reaction, nothing. Like it's everyday that he has an application for a mismatched passport with someone else's photo n sign on it. Nevertheless, I comply and jot down an application, and ask him for some form of acknowledgment receipt that he has accepted the surrendered passport. He looks at me like i have uttered a curse in Swahili (which I havent btw) and asks, simply - "Acknowledgement? for what? U have the receipt of the application form right? You never got YOUR passport. We'll correct it and send it in a week MOST LIKELY." Those two words. not good. still, i thank him n leave.

11:00 Exit Passport office

On to the regular joint for a sandwich n burger-like substance on my way back to college via the noon bus. on the way to the bus, I manage to acquire from my (again) regular book-nook, ten books weighing in at just over 3 kilo's, which have no distant relation with the scrap of paper our professors refer to as syllabus.

13:00 Get Off The Bus

Sorry, I missed the part about the13 sad deaths I died while sleeping standing up in the way-too-overcrowded bus. Reach college 15 minutes too late for a lecture that I haven't attended this month. At all.
Exchange pleasantries and curses with a friend in Hyderabad over the phone while draining the Gatorade bottle that's supposed to be my lunch.

Now comes the fun part.
I go for the second lecture, only this time I miss the roll call amongst the chatter that indicates my general location in a class. I stand up to request attendance , and when asked why I didn't answer the first time, I simply quip that he wasn't audible back here where i was sitting. That's it. somehow that's very funny, and the class loses it's calm demeanour and I, my attendance. sigh. Have to skip the next lecture for a chore I needed to run. The errande stretches to 4:30 pm, and I manage to squeeze in half a dozen trips to the canteen area and a nice long debate on "Atrociousness" into this period while waiting.

17:00 Errand deferred to next working day

Next thing I now, I'm helping some friends to set up the Personal Adress System for no good reason that I can think of, followed by addressing a batch of freshers about the pro's and con's of joining a technical club. all this gets too much for both the near-100 strong fresher's group and me, so i start off an impromptu quiz. soon, it's past the girl's in-time (18:30 hours) and I still going on about god-knows-what shoe brand started by a Czech that had a near monopoly over the Indian Shoe market for quite some time in the past .
(BATA, if you must know)

20:00 Evicted from the lecture hall

The peon in-charge of closing up the lecture made up his mind and did the needful at 8 sharp and we moved en masse to the coffee stall at the Inner Co-Op stores(IC for short). Juniors leave, realizing they missed snacks and are now starving.More bakar with the guy who had got the thing together, which continues into a discussion about everything and ends an hour later in the hostel.

21:00 Drift off to H IV

Not the virus, the hostel where I used to stay until recently, when they decided that my bathing schedule (daily) was in violation of the hostel average (weekly/monthly). hang around playing cs, chatting up, and drifting off to sleep waiting for midnight to arrive so that I can wish a friend happy birthday.

Doze off, wake up, wish the guy, inhale way too much secondary smoke, head out to my hostel to clear my head, call up a second new born 24 yr old in cal, wish him happy birthday.

01:00 Reach my Hostel

Call up a 19-yr month old and chat to the end of my phone's credit limit, ending in a hazy good night.

02:00 Blogger : The Crazy Diamond - Create Post : I Should Write This

Type this thoroughly pointless post, still wondering why I'm up at 2 am typing gibberish when I have a lecture in 7 hours.

Hmmm. I do have a point there.

Good night and Good luck.
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Now playing: Poets of the Fall - Late Goodbye

I Am Sikander Ansari

Seems like Mr.Murphy has way too much of an affinity for me...

I get my passport, without ever having the pre-requisite CID verification, only 6 months to the day I applied for it, while the supposed duration for the process is supposed to be 60 days.
Nevertheless, the best part of the story was :
Finding the Photograph and Signature of a certain unknown Sikander Ansari in place of my rightful photograph and signature.

The Visual Proof (PDF)

As they say, wherever I'm concerned, life is always
As FUBAR As It Gets...

Sonnet XVII

Was reminded of this from Patch Adams...
remember hearing it in parts but never as a whole

I don't love you as if you were the salt-rose, topaz
or arrow of carnations that propagate fire:
I love you as certain dark things are loved,
secretly, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that doesn't bloom and carries
hidden within itself the light of those flowers,
and thanks to your love, darkly in my body
lives the dense fragrance that rises from the earth.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where,
I love you simply, without problems or pride:
I love you in this way because I don't know any other way of loving

but this, in which there is no I or you,
so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand,
so intimate that when I fall asleep it is your eyes that close.

Pablo Neruda
Sonnet XVII from 100 Love Sonnets
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Now playing:
Don McLean - Vincent